Wendy Marriott has been a youth leader at Riverwood Presbyterian Church for eight years and loves it. At PY Encourage Sydney 2025, Wendy ran a workshop teaching the attendees that running better games starts with something deeper than rules and resources: it starts with inviting everyone to the table.
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Games in kids and youth ministry aren’t simply time-fillers, energy outlets before Bible time, or tools to engage those less interested in other parts of the program… They’re an opportunity for connection, learning, and discipleship.
Here’s a breakdown of some key principles from her session to help you think more about how you use games in kids and youth ministry:
1. Start with the purpose — Come and eat at the table of God’s kingdom
Jesus didn’t just preach, he taught through stories, questions, actions, and experiences. He also ate with people. Games and activities are vital relational teaching and application tools with their own functions and purposes.
Before you choose a game, ask:
- Why are we doing this?
- What do I want them to learn or experience through this?
- How does this help them grow in faith, understanding, or community?
- Does the chosen activity meet the above goals or not?
Let your purpose determine your choice of activity.
“Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” – Philippians 4:9 (NIV)
2. Know your players — Who are you inviting?
A good host knows their guests. Do you know your young people, what they love, what stresses them out, and what helps them feel safe?
Here are a few scenarios Wendy shared to help the group consider how they might best respond and lead in these situations:
- You bring balloons to youth, and throw them out as a surprise at the end, yelling at all the kids to pop them. One of the kids melts down from the noise. After they regulate, you apologise. They say it’s ok, but then they struggle to trust you later. It wasn’t on their registration form!
- Your youth can’t seem to pay attention when you’re explaining rules, and spend more time trying to frustrate you and play with your explanation of rules than playing the game.
- You have a girl that always seems keen, but when you ask if there’s any games she doesn’t like, she surprises you. She says she actually doesn’t like playing basketball every week and she’s bored because the other games are too easy.
What would you do or change in these scenarios? How can you show them they’re welcome or to get out of their comfort zone? Pay attention. Ask questions. Learn what excites, overwhelms, or bores your group, and respond thoughtfully.
3. Understand your role — Be a great host. Facilitate, don’t dictate.
You’re not there to control every moment. You’re there to create space for meaningful experiences. A great facilitator welcomes, explains, models, invites, and is actively involved in helping the participants to engage and get the most out of the activity.
Good games:
- Include everyone
- Allow room for learning and connection through play
- Are fun and situational
- Are debriefed to help young people reflect
When your game includes hidden rules or unclear goals, kids become confused, frustrated, or disconnected. Clear instructions, fair boundaries, and genuine invitations make all the difference. Active spectators are participants too.
4. Set simple rules and clear boundaries – How big is the table? Can I dance on it?
Games need structure, but not rigidity. Set rules that are easy to understand and uphold.
Ask your team:
- What are we playing for? How are we defining success?
- What behaviour do we expect?
- How do we handle unexpected reactions?
- How can we make it safe (emotionally and physically) for everyone to participate?
- Can I explain the game completely in under 2 minutes? 20 seconds?
Assess and manage your risks so that kids can focus on the gold at hand with the most independence. Tools like the Breaking The Silence Risk Matrix can help you think this through clearly.
5. Let the game happen — Let them eat!
You’ve called the guests, bought the food, cleaned the house, prepared a recipe, cooked the dish, and now… You have to let them eat. Enjoy, watch, and provide support. How is your group connecting? Learning? Is there laughter? Exclusion? Do you need to provide some bread and bring the difficulty down?
Take confidence in John 14. Jesus prepares a place for us, tells us where to go, and still Thomas is lost. You’re doing the hard work, now trust God to do the heart work. Take responsibility for your games and don’t be afraid to pivot if something’s not working. Often the best moments come when you step back and let the group own the space you’ve provided.
6. Debrief well — Digest and connect the dots
What just happened? What did we notice? Where did we struggle or thrive?
Ask your group to reflect:
- How did you feel during that game?
- What did you learn about others? Yourself? God?
- How does this connect to our theme/message tonight?
Debriefing helps solidify learning and gives space for deeper insights to surface.
The best games aren’t crowd-sourced chaos or endless rounds of football. They’re intentional, inclusive, and tied to a bigger purpose: growing young people in their love for God and others.
Want to go deeper?
Here are some of the resources Wendy recommended:
- Fuller Youth Institute: “Your New Mantra for Youth Group Games”, Rachel Dodd Minn, 2022
- Playmeo – The toolkit for facilitators worldwide
- Youth Group Games – Free Online Game Instructions
- Best for quick ideas. Be aware – submissions are crowd sourced, so you will need to check and rewrite names, explanations and procedures as they usually only make sense to the author. Don’t let the tags dictate what you use, focus on the purpose and methods.
- Flip the Script: Disrupting Tradition for the Sake of the Next Generation, Lifeway Christian Resources, 2022
- Bridging Differences: Effective Intergroup Communication, SAGE Publications, Inc., 2004
- Theology of Play, Jurgen Moltmann, 1972
If you would like to watch Wendy’s workshop from PY Encourage Sydney 2025, you can sign up to our free Resource Library here.
If you would like to chat more about games and activities or anything else related to kids and youth ministry, you can get in contact with us here.
